Finding it hard to sleep tonight, my mind mingling and meandering through the day's events pressing deeply into my heart. The pinnacle of today's many memorable moments was watching twenty fifth grade students huddled together infront of their dear friend's casket, sharing memories and precious washing words to an aching army of mourners; words of sincerest stories and simple sonnets reaching deep into all who was and remains in our hearts, KaSandra. Those who could, spoke with dignity and tenderness equal to things shared by adults before them. It was a testimony of beauty, sweetness and zest for life that was and remains KaSandra.
Hardest today was watching those very same children of strength, mourn with the emptiness in their hearts for the absence of a dear friend. With tomorrow being the funeral, many more will probably collide with the reality as many have been touched with the warm, sincere life that KaSandra contagiously spread.
Maybe the wave of what was today is now washing over me, my blogging purging my soul in such a way that my pillow calls for me to surrender for this day. Tomorrow, should it arrive for me, will bring more. I want to drink it all and drink it deeply mingling and meandering through the path the Almighty God lays ahead. He will be my strength and comforter as He can for you too.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
Of Life Love and Living
For years repeated chord progressions passed pressed under my fingers on my guitar, linked with passion and beauty, yearning for lyrics that equaled their etherial, mesmerizing qualities and for years they have been unanswered until now. It seems my heart, being forged and fashioned by the depth of diving deeply into life have brought me to a time my senses now elevated, see and hear with new found verve for life, love and living.
How often it seems my days were spent in just muddling through each one, each moment each morsel of routine until it's finale, only to plunk my head, my pillow waiting as respite from it all. Every day filled with things to do, or places, or people, or work, and like laundry, never the task ever finished. Yet now, I find the identical tasks more rich and beautiful than ever before, for I used to focus on their doing, but now discover the profoundness of their forging, fashioning my life and heart into one of depth and character unattainable any other way.
Life is lived in bits and pieces, like the undistiguishable pieces of a puzzle scattered on the table before us. Each piece seemingly insignificant, requires a discerning eye examining color and shape with diligence in order to find its final home and part of the whole. There are some easier to place, the edges that surround the life, with a great deal of satisfaction in it's completion, but the richness of all that is the life, its interior, takes time to place piece by piece, day by day.
I now find myself ceasing for a time from looking ahead toward life, love and living, to turning back, standing back to gaze at the puzzle of my life and what has already been assembled, rather than being consumed with the placement of the next piece. As I did, a flood of feelings filled my heart, washed with a wave of warmth huddling me before my Lord. Now fifty two years of His puzzle building has assembled something far beyond what I could have ever imagined or dreamed.
My music now takes a huge turn, my words and lyrics a deeply forged passion flowing from life, love and living, for truly as I look back, I see incredible grace washing over my ordinary life, building an extraordinary puzzle that He alone, yes God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, have forged in me.
What do you see of your life, love and living? Are you abandoning things and people who are part of your puzzle, seeking something or someone that wants to destroy it? Will you return to your first love, remain diligent in seeking the master puzzlemaker and obedient to His calling in your life? Will you let Him do as He has in me, taking an ordinary life, a sin filled life and build an extraordinary puzzle?
My life continues with many mistakes, falls, errors, even disappointments, but when I hold dear all the things He established in my life, He washes me with His grace, and transforms my weaknesses in His glory. It is now time for us all to submit to the Master Puzzlemaker, bringing His sweetness and fragrance to a desperate world in need.
How often it seems my days were spent in just muddling through each one, each moment each morsel of routine until it's finale, only to plunk my head, my pillow waiting as respite from it all. Every day filled with things to do, or places, or people, or work, and like laundry, never the task ever finished. Yet now, I find the identical tasks more rich and beautiful than ever before, for I used to focus on their doing, but now discover the profoundness of their forging, fashioning my life and heart into one of depth and character unattainable any other way.
Life is lived in bits and pieces, like the undistiguishable pieces of a puzzle scattered on the table before us. Each piece seemingly insignificant, requires a discerning eye examining color and shape with diligence in order to find its final home and part of the whole. There are some easier to place, the edges that surround the life, with a great deal of satisfaction in it's completion, but the richness of all that is the life, its interior, takes time to place piece by piece, day by day.
I now find myself ceasing for a time from looking ahead toward life, love and living, to turning back, standing back to gaze at the puzzle of my life and what has already been assembled, rather than being consumed with the placement of the next piece. As I did, a flood of feelings filled my heart, washed with a wave of warmth huddling me before my Lord. Now fifty two years of His puzzle building has assembled something far beyond what I could have ever imagined or dreamed.
My music now takes a huge turn, my words and lyrics a deeply forged passion flowing from life, love and living, for truly as I look back, I see incredible grace washing over my ordinary life, building an extraordinary puzzle that He alone, yes God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, have forged in me.
What do you see of your life, love and living? Are you abandoning things and people who are part of your puzzle, seeking something or someone that wants to destroy it? Will you return to your first love, remain diligent in seeking the master puzzlemaker and obedient to His calling in your life? Will you let Him do as He has in me, taking an ordinary life, a sin filled life and build an extraordinary puzzle?
My life continues with many mistakes, falls, errors, even disappointments, but when I hold dear all the things He established in my life, He washes me with His grace, and transforms my weaknesses in His glory. It is now time for us all to submit to the Master Puzzlemaker, bringing His sweetness and fragrance to a desperate world in need.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Warm Winds Wind
Currently it is a time of life for me, that is huddled with the loss of friends and family. Two years and two days ago I recieved a very concerned phone call from my son informing me that his soon to be father-in-law had fallen from the roof of their fifth wheel trailer found by a neighbor who called 911. While no one knows exactly why he fell, or if there were any other circumstances, Mike's injuries took his life a day and a half later.
Just a few weekends before, Mike, his wife Linda, their daugther Melissa, our son Bryce, Carrie and I found ourselves shoulder to shoulder on an excursion up to Julian in their truck to explore some venues for our kid's wedding. Our two family's lives were happily winding around eachother's with a sweetness and fragrance that exceeded my prayers for our boy. He had found the lady of his dreams and we beleived her to be the beautiful answer to our prayers, a Godly lady with strength and gentleness. As we continued up the winding roads to Julian, our hearts grew with ardent anticipation and peace. Our times together were always peppered with rauchous laughter and memorable moments, this trip would be no different. We checked out several venues for the blessed union, settling on a place called "Angel's Landing", and indeed, its stunning veiw of meadow, valley and mountains rising in the background reminded us that Angels had landed in our lives, filling it with the blessed touch of heaven. We were totally unaware of the more immediate event which would soon rock our world and tranform, for eternity, our hearts.
While casually growing together, our two families were driven even closer as they asked me to help them plan Mike's memorial winding up, yet another mountain excursion together. With the strength of our Lord, it was well attended in another local venue viewing the hills and nature that he so loved to mountain bike in. The lives of many of our friends were now linked with the lives of the Chamney's in an event that changed all of ours.
We visited the peaceful and glorious mountain spot where we spread Mike's ashes yesterday, both families in their entirety. The air was crisp and the wind cool, but the sun's blazing warmth was powerful. The hawks, bluebirds and woodpeckers winged thier way through the wind and brilliant cerulian skies. Yet as we stood there in memory, touched with sadness at Mike's absence, moments of laughter of some of his antics, sharing the things we knew he loved to do, we celebrated; The wind warming as it wound around us.
No one would say that this part of the journey has been painless, not one of us would wish such things on anyone else, but for us, it is where we are and has shaped who we are. The end of Psalm 33 says:
We wait in hope for the Lord. He is our strength and our shield. In Him, our hearts rejoice for we trust His holy name. May Your unfailing love rest upon us, oh Lord, even as we put our hope in You.
In times like these when the warm winds wind through our lives while a form of darkness surrounds them, we know where hope can found. We know who holds life in the balance and will carry us through our deepest struggles. May Your unfailing love rest upon us, oh Lord, even as we put our hope, in You.
Just a few weekends before, Mike, his wife Linda, their daugther Melissa, our son Bryce, Carrie and I found ourselves shoulder to shoulder on an excursion up to Julian in their truck to explore some venues for our kid's wedding. Our two family's lives were happily winding around eachother's with a sweetness and fragrance that exceeded my prayers for our boy. He had found the lady of his dreams and we beleived her to be the beautiful answer to our prayers, a Godly lady with strength and gentleness. As we continued up the winding roads to Julian, our hearts grew with ardent anticipation and peace. Our times together were always peppered with rauchous laughter and memorable moments, this trip would be no different. We checked out several venues for the blessed union, settling on a place called "Angel's Landing", and indeed, its stunning veiw of meadow, valley and mountains rising in the background reminded us that Angels had landed in our lives, filling it with the blessed touch of heaven. We were totally unaware of the more immediate event which would soon rock our world and tranform, for eternity, our hearts.
While casually growing together, our two families were driven even closer as they asked me to help them plan Mike's memorial winding up, yet another mountain excursion together. With the strength of our Lord, it was well attended in another local venue viewing the hills and nature that he so loved to mountain bike in. The lives of many of our friends were now linked with the lives of the Chamney's in an event that changed all of ours.
We visited the peaceful and glorious mountain spot where we spread Mike's ashes yesterday, both families in their entirety. The air was crisp and the wind cool, but the sun's blazing warmth was powerful. The hawks, bluebirds and woodpeckers winged thier way through the wind and brilliant cerulian skies. Yet as we stood there in memory, touched with sadness at Mike's absence, moments of laughter of some of his antics, sharing the things we knew he loved to do, we celebrated; The wind warming as it wound around us.
No one would say that this part of the journey has been painless, not one of us would wish such things on anyone else, but for us, it is where we are and has shaped who we are. The end of Psalm 33 says:
We wait in hope for the Lord. He is our strength and our shield. In Him, our hearts rejoice for we trust His holy name. May Your unfailing love rest upon us, oh Lord, even as we put our hope in You.
In times like these when the warm winds wind through our lives while a form of darkness surrounds them, we know where hope can found. We know who holds life in the balance and will carry us through our deepest struggles. May Your unfailing love rest upon us, oh Lord, even as we put our hope, in You.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
A Washing Wave
Today our entire elementary school stopped to honor our dearly departed KaSandra. The tragedy of death never comes at a convenient time in any life, hers especially difficult as only a 5th grade student whose father also died of a similar brain tumor a few years ago. Survived by her dear mother, brother and an older sister, KaSandra had an extra exuberant smile and a zest for life that always warmed hearts and any room when she walked in. Blessed were the individuals who took to time to engage this young lady's friendship or kindred celebration for the simplest of things.
Today, we wore purple, passed out purple ribbons to tie around the wrist, having hand shaped construction paper cutouts of various shades of purple for students to write a note on, and posters to decorate with stamps and markers. These will decorate the tables as centerpieces and walls at her memorial. Therapeutic and sweet, all of our students seemed to find it in their hearts to share sweet words of encouragement and sympathy in amazing ways!!!
One student wrote…"Things cancer can’t do. It can’t tear apart a family, it can’t erase the memories of her life, it can’t end hope, or end our love."
Cancer can’t stop our memories of KaSandra. Wow, if that doesn’t move a heart, something is surely wrong. After Tuesday’s wave of grief washed over our school, today’s wave of hope brought a sweetness, a heavenly fragrance, that was truly refreshing with hope and glory. Somehow, KaSandra’s death has opened a door, a door to celebration of all that we have, and the blessings of those we currently have to share these times with. Like it or not, our public elementary school is bathed in prayers of many of it's teachers, and staff. So many have stated that there is a special sweetness in this ordinary school, but it is no ordinary school. It is quietly and graciously filled with the presence of our most holy God.
In and through every trial, hope can be found in the washing wave of God as He pours over our souls, bringing fragrant and meaningful comfort in our deepest affliction. His glory and beauty can be seen in precious life, if we will choose to cherish every soul we know, every heart we encounter. Such will be my desire in this blog. To share the testimony of God as he guides me through lives; His washing wave pouring into my soul. My prayer is that some of you may discover His richness as you open your hearts to Christ along with me.
Today, we wore purple, passed out purple ribbons to tie around the wrist, having hand shaped construction paper cutouts of various shades of purple for students to write a note on, and posters to decorate with stamps and markers. These will decorate the tables as centerpieces and walls at her memorial. Therapeutic and sweet, all of our students seemed to find it in their hearts to share sweet words of encouragement and sympathy in amazing ways!!!
One student wrote…"Things cancer can’t do. It can’t tear apart a family, it can’t erase the memories of her life, it can’t end hope, or end our love."
Cancer can’t stop our memories of KaSandra. Wow, if that doesn’t move a heart, something is surely wrong. After Tuesday’s wave of grief washed over our school, today’s wave of hope brought a sweetness, a heavenly fragrance, that was truly refreshing with hope and glory. Somehow, KaSandra’s death has opened a door, a door to celebration of all that we have, and the blessings of those we currently have to share these times with. Like it or not, our public elementary school is bathed in prayers of many of it's teachers, and staff. So many have stated that there is a special sweetness in this ordinary school, but it is no ordinary school. It is quietly and graciously filled with the presence of our most holy God.
In and through every trial, hope can be found in the washing wave of God as He pours over our souls, bringing fragrant and meaningful comfort in our deepest affliction. His glory and beauty can be seen in precious life, if we will choose to cherish every soul we know, every heart we encounter. Such will be my desire in this blog. To share the testimony of God as he guides me through lives; His washing wave pouring into my soul. My prayer is that some of you may discover His richness as you open your hearts to Christ along with me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)