Standing at The Welcome Window

Tomorrow I will make a drive up north to visit a friend (I call him 'dad') finding himself at the welcome window under hospice care along with his bride of some 70 plus years (I call her 'mom').  I call them 'mom' and 'dad' not because I don't have wonderful parents.  I love and appreciate greatly, my real mom and dad.  But their title is bestowed because they have become spiritual parents for this soul, 'dad' clearly demonstrating to me the humility of a God inspired man, living corporate life with integrity.

The Dunbars are parents of dear friends Carrie and I met at our past church.  Warren and Val lived very close to a place I found myself working summers and holidays, with Dr. Michael Klein, at JPL.  For many years, I had the keys to their home and with a simple phone call was given green light to stay at the Dunbar hotel, gratis.  I would always look around for repairs I could make to their home, or be given task by their daughter and son-in-law to work on computer or help 'mom' with computer tutoring.  'Dad' loves science and we had many conversations about what we were 'up to' in radio astronomy.  He was thrilled one project I worked on had a focus involving school kids as part of the research.  'Mom' has a great love for overseas mission work and it fostered my continued movement as I eventually found myself heading to Croatia and Bosnia on such endeavors.  For me, the Dunbars have a great one two punch and I have found myself endeared as a member and 'pastor' to the family through the waves life would bring them.

Warren is a solid man of God.  A retired Banker, he and his wonderful bride, Val, have worked together using their gifts, talents and money to invest in the great works of our King's Kingdom.  'Dad' mixed his passion for geology and stone cutting to make and sell jewelry with 100% of all money (not just proceeds) sent to the field.  'Mom' also uses her gift for  creating watercolor images with the same sales ethic as her hubby.  Frequently poised, draped from Carrie's neck and ears, are many of 'dad's' works while our home is also beautified with plenty of 'moms' watercolors.  A few are gifts, but most were purchased in support of missionaries.  'Mom' and 'dad' blesses as God blessed them, and He  blesses them with much in many ways.

Missions overseas was primary to them, making sure when missionaries returned home and were in their neck of the woods, or in the states, they still felt well supported and cared for.  They also have networked with many out in the field with care packages and love.  They partnered with me on my overseas investments into the lives of others as well.  Quietly, humbly and devotedly this couple demonstrates to this heart, the power of God unveiled through His children, for His mighty glory.

I lead a grief recovery program at my church and one statement I use is, "If we didn't love much, it wouldn't hurt much. The more we love, the more we miss the one we loved as they move off planet."  The real important question would seem, "Would you rather have not loved or been loved to escape this pain?"  Only a fool would answer "Yes",  because it is love and the deepest relationships that bring exceeding joy, huge deposits of comfort and meaning into our lives, and face it, the harder we grieve the more clear its wake indicates the importance that person had, in life, for us.  For some, deep angst in grief could rise from guilt, their lack of attention to a relationship they cherished but never took time to continue investment, left unsolvable because now, they are gone.  But hopefully for most, our grief rests on the laurels of deep, rich, meaningful love.

Sure, I have lost many I love in my life, and it does sting.  Two things bring great comfort into this heart as I press through the joys and sadness which visit with great regularity; 1. my faith, 2. deep and wonderful relationships I have with friends and family.  In a way, I have chosen to move through life such that a loss of any friend or family member will have monumental impact, great sorrow, in this heart and soul.  But, I am not without hope.

As I go to visit Warren and Val, I have confidence.  I am confident I can look into Warren's eyes and let him know of the incredible value and leadership God has allowed him forge in my life.  I am assured that I will see 'dad' again and that he will move forward toward and into ultimate freedom and rest whenever our LORD calls him home.  Sure, these eyes are welling up with tears as I ponder his absence as I write, tears of real sadness at the thought.  I will miss 'dad'...a lot.  I do not enjoy seeing him as his body fails, but I need to put closure for me and for him with my visit tomorrow.  I am hoping and praying for many more, fueling my fire of grief all the more as well, but I will not allow myself to live in regret.  I choose to drink deeply in this living together stuff.

None of us escape death.  In my blog, "The Bridge", we have a choice as we all head toward it.  The bridge will arrive on our path as we come to the end of our lives.  None of us knows when that will occur.  Many are unprepared for it's unexpected arrival.  Yet for some, they walk, with confidence, stepping on the bridge with freedom and joy.  Slowly they loose their grasp of those they love here looking forward to arriving on the other side of the bridge, waiting for a brief bit as those they love will join them there.

I have had opportunity to see many, toward the end of their lives, walk.   It is clear that 'dad' is walking as one who has great confidence in God, finding himself standing at the welcome window.  And for me?  It stings.  It hurts.  It isn't easy to think about.  But I know I will join my friends and this 'dad', tomorrow, hopefully other times and then someday soon in eternity with my LORD.  I grieve, but not as one without hope.  For one day soon, I, and I pray, the rest of my friends and family will find themselves in the same place as Warren, standing in line at the welcome window of heaven because we know Jesus and He acknowledges that He knows us.

Do you know you will be welcomed at the window to joyful eternity?  What assurances do you have?  Is it only based on 'your goodness'?  Are you confident that is enough?  How much weight will the disobedience and selfish desires hold in your balance of 'goodness'?  Are you sure you have a clear understanding of the weight of your ungodly actions in the past?

Of Moment and Movement

Yet another image from our recent vacation.  One of my favorite photographic techniques is capturing change over time.  The waterfall in this image has an interesting look because of this technique.  Being the science guy, I can factually state that everything in this picture, including the rocks are undergoing change.  The plants are growing, all the rocks ever so slowly are being eroded away (more so the ones water is generously flowing over and impacting), and, of course, the water is moving most rapidly of all.

If you, reading regularly, have noticed, my writing and this blog has changed over time.  Initially, maybe because I thought I had something to prove, my words demonstrated linguistic prowess with much vocabulary and alliteration; at the expense of making its reading so cognitive that most didn't, or stopped.  A rare image would appear if I had one that fit my thought for the moment/day.  In short, it is a real picture of change over time relative to this act of blogging, and this heart on the journey; this blog becoming example of footprints and faith for this guy.

After decades of living, learning, doing, teaching, capturing, loving and hardest of all, waiting, this soul has met head on toward another adventure, one immersed in photography and writing.  This kind of adventure is a precipice I have found myself standing, in life, with great frequency.   I hope you have found this new change dynamic and refreshing.  Daily posts, frequent images, interesting thoughts. 

A friend of mine once told me, "We know more about the last 24 hours than we do the last 24 years".  My response?  "If we keep filling our heads with the short-term moments of time, without reflection long-term, of course there is no large scale revelation and learning,"  Today's world seems consumed with moments, here today, gone to Mau'i (couldn't resist; this image taken there).  There is much lost when we don't stop to remember, don't ponder the learning, and especially don't stop to ponder how the sequence of events brought us to where we find ourselves 'now'. 

Do you find yourself in the midst of divorce?  You probably didn't invest and commit to moments and movement to keep your marriage alive.  Finding yourself loosing your home in these tough economic times?  You probably didn't live and save like this might be a possibility (loosing your job, your spouse etc.).  If, however, we only focus on the moment, we will not learn.  If we think, 'that will never happen to me', we fool ourselves especially if we do nothing to prepare and prevent such disaster upon sad occasion. 

I wish I could take credit for where I find myself sitting, having survived four years of being mostly unemployed and underemployed, still saving, still living pretty well, still moving forward.  Sure, I wrestled with 'whoa is me' and 'doesn't anyone find worth in employing me for who I am?' issues. It has been my faith, my learning to trust God, my seeing that He has and continues moving my soul forward in relationship with Him and what He takes me through that has significant impact, provided hope in what seemed hopeless, all with promise that it forge meaning and purpose into my soul.  He has also helped us with His guidance in marriage, home and employment.  He harbored Carrie and I from being chained to the ways of the world, and we are very thankful for His leading, His blessing.

It should seem clear that I celebrate both moment and movement in my life.  While we all usually embrace and enjoy many celebratory moments in our lives, we seldom appreciate the tragic and difficult, eroding moments in our lives.  We will never gain proper, deep understanding of purpose unless we reflect upon the larger, longer-term movement hopefully found in our lives.  In my recent blogs, you can read my take on trials and tribulations for they sit as balance on the scale of life and living.  The image captured and posited in today's blog demonstrates, metaphorically a bit, the beauty of capturing and pondering an instant over greater time.  For me, the process of posting a picture a day of our vacation has done much to help me cherish and remember the time Carrie and I had to enjoy one another's company and reflect upon 30 years of married life, good and bad.

Have you taken time to examine your life in time-lapse?  How do you find purpose in your life?  What do you think, is the purpose of your life?  Really?  If part of your purpose is to be happily married with great kids, what are you doing to assure or encourage such?  If your purpose is to climb the corporate ladder and achieve wealth, will that bring enough purpose and sufficient reward?  What have you learned from your mistakes and errors?  Most importantly of all, what will the result be when you check off this planet?  Will a legacy remain?  Will your soul continue?  How do you know?

These footprints have been laid in faith; not just faith in the positive, faith in people or faith in my job, my marriage, my kids, my friends, rather faith in God.  He and I talk.  I find myself listening more than speaking these days while praying less for myself but more for others He brings to mind.  This heart has discovered solace, energy, hope, appreciation and beauty in my circumstance and life.  Indeed, I am thankful that my LORD has led me to appreciate the beauty of moment and movement He has directed in this life.  How about you?  When did you last take inventory, consider highlights and lowlights, trials, sorrows as the forging of purpose into your life?  Have you invited God into your midst?  Really? 

Part of a Greater Group

Yesterday, I had opportunity, attending with my dad, the 'Taking Control of Your Diabetes" conference; Me, being diagnosed as heading toward type 2 (failing the glucose tolerance test), he being foisted into diabetes with the extraction of his colon in near fatal  and unsuccessful attempt of the Whipple procedure.  We each gleaned much, but for me, one moment stands out worthy of blogging.

While preparing leave from the conference, we entered the room of 'relief' prior to making our way back to dad's car for the drive home.  While there, my dad saw Bobby Deen (chef and son of Paula Deen he now a champion for diabetic cooking) while washing our hands.  My dad acknowledged his presence saying "Mr. Deen."  His instant response?  "That would be my dad."  A brief exchange ensued between my dad an he about his enjoyment of Bobby's show along with my father's appreciation for his work.  Bobby's response spoke to his amazement at the work of the television industry to make everything look good.  The whole encounter was genuinely filled with an earthiness, as if two humans, rooted in the same soil speak of the intersection, their lives crossing as they move through their own with an sincere, respectful interchange speaking volumes into this heart.

What is it about our family and celebrity encounters in the restroom?  Maybe for another blog, but suffice it saying that my son, my dad, and I have met and relieved ourselves, meeting celebrities in this common haven.  Most importantly, however, is that we have been taught and learned from our parents the genuine understanding that everyone is human, and, when treated as such, there is genuine, earthy reality as we cross paths, with commoners or celebrities; Bobby Deen clearly demonstrating a gracious,, humble heart toward an genuinely admiring 'fan'.

 I have come to realize that every man puts on his pants in similar fashion, and requires the use of 'the facilities' so to speak.  Yes, indeed, EVERY man also is worthy of respect, from the janitor to the celebrity, for without them, our world, our daily lives would be encumbered and overwhelmed with the need to do everything ourselves, including entertaining.   Even more so, my heart was warmed by a son, Bobby Dean becoming a champion for his mother, Paula, who now has entered the battle of diabetes.  As I think about it, Bobby is demonstrating the effective use of  a gift given and invested into his heart by his mom.    In one brief encounter, I was given joyful observation of two men I admire addressing life with honesty and humility.  It was the type of moment that could not be orchestrated and certainly was based in the daily part of life.  It is the kind of encounter that clearly speaks to the fact of living, being part of a greater group, the one we call human. 

His Purpose, His Glory.

This is one of the many images captured on our most recent trip to Mau'i, Hawai'i.  Carrie and I, having privilege to celebrate 30 years of marriage, decided to take a trip to the only island she has yet to see (besides Lanai and Molokai) as a tourist.  I posted it, while there, on my Facebook with the following words:

Psalm 42:7 Deep beckons deep in your roaring waterfalls; all your pounding waves and breakers have swept over me...11 Why then are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God!

Some of my friends are living in a time where they feel waves and breakers are overwhelming them. Even while here, in earthly paradise, my prayers have risen to God for his help in their time of need. With God as our rock, we will stand.

They say one picture is worth a thousand words, and yet, while a photo may speak volumes, to me there appears a single thought.  Out of that singular thought, thousands of situations fit with volumes of words I'm sure, and I hope my images, and photographic sentiments do such in your life.  

Most people question calamity, struggle and angst.  I have come to embrace it.  Understand, please!  I am not saying I like it, for the toils of life are indeed torturous, but I have discovered that when I arrive to the other side, I know something, have experienced something, which opens the door providing ability to minister to another soul as they endure similar trial.  While not garnering me privilege to freely speak "I know exactly how you feel", I have inklings, strong ones, allowing me to come alongside another.  

Compassion, according to dictionary.com is "a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering."  If I have walked a similar, dischordant, difficult road, I have learned that I do have deep sympathy and sorrow for another stricken with such misfortune.  I wish I could alleviate their suffering, but I know I can't and if I were allowed to, would rob them of that gift given to me.  For as I worked through my struggle, the ability to come alongside another is presented so I can join another in their time of need with a tinge of comfort.  

If we stop to examine the word a bit, it seems almost a compound word, come and passion pressed together.  Compassion is best lived when we take the time to join another in their fight.  Our passion joined with theirs in the most difficult of times, for we possess the glimmer of hope, having survived similar calamity.  A friend of mine once told me, "We seem to be living in a world where feeling bad about another is good enough".  My response?  "And that falls far short of our calling as human beings created in the image of God."  

I believe I speak for everyone when I say "No one likes misfortune and toil; no one adores death and disease; no one cherishes pain and suffering."  and believe me I am there.  I am, however, choosing to live as I believe we are all called; to live a life of compassion, embracing the struggles I am led through for the cause of humanity, the comfort we can offer one another, having endured, having drunk deeply, the depths of suffering making it to the other side.  

In a recent blog "Encouraging Courage", I wrote about the endemic rise of childhood suicide, my RN wife, taking a class to help healthcare professionals look for the signs that  may point the way toward intervention in this sad issue.  The real sad part, is that, those succeeding in taking their lives will never have opportunity to discover the impetus found in "Slaying the Giant" (another recent blog), and for this heart, even sadder yet is that we don't rush to take our victory alongside another now in similar struggle.  

Have we lost sight of our purpose?  Have we succumb to all the distractions of pursing a counterfeit happiness instead of discovering the real deal?  Do we have the courage to join another facing a difficult battle?  

Indeed it takes courage to embrace calamity, struggle and angst.  Required courage is found in those who come alongside another with compassion.  The pinnacle of humanity is in the doing of such, bringing hope and love into a hurting life.  Doing so for a life in crisis would dash suicide.  

I have been blessed with those who have done such for me in my darkest of life's moments.  I could not have made it through without their compassion and care.  And, it is my utmost desire to be and do the same for those whose path I am privileged to cross as together we, embracing calamity, work through it to the other side.  Two humans, one God showing the way through; He working on our hearts for His purpose, His glory.  Are we up for the challenge?  Not alone, instead?  Together.

Rejoice, Revel and Appreciate

Photography, for me, has been both hobby and profession.  It all started back in Junior High, bitten by the bug after taking a graphic arts class.  We explored painting, printing (with a press), silk screening calligraphy and photography with both calligraphy and photography pursued as life-long ventures.  I remember my mom's amazement that such beautiful lettering could rise from her son with such awful handwriting.  Indeed, my handwriting so illegible that my English teacher told me if I submitted another paper as such it would not pass, telling me to drop a class and take up typing...and I did.  But that is for another blog.

After completing the graphics art class, I remember an uncle showing me his sunset pictures captured with what he called an 'instatragic' camera (actually called instamatic).  Our family, impressed with the quality, purchased one.  Family pictures of our activities ensued.  Eventually, it fell into my hands and I started taking pictures with our cartridge filled camera...and, as dad put it, it started getting expensive.  But my folks were willing to let their son take pictures of sunsets and ice cubes floating on the top of a soda.  They saw something in the way their son explored with film, and were willing to expense my often flawed experimentation to capture the stuff 'I saw'.  We didn't have a lot of money then, so I am confident it was a sacrifice.

Just before entering high school, my parents noticed my photographic interest had not waned, and for Christmas, bought me a Minolta SLR (single lens reflex) camera.  A whole new world of photographic expression exploded inside my heart and onto paper.  Depth of field, crisper colors and control drew my passion even more.  My dad had a friend, Rick Bobby who had a darkroom in his garage.  Rick and his wife gave me the combination to their garage giving me access anytime to use, for free, his haven of photographic creation.  I remember going into the darkroom in the afternoon emerging out of it, to my surprise, the next morning!

This opportunity allowed me to continue my black and white imaging, but Rick taught me about a slide to print color imaging system called CibaChrome.  Rick also told me that failing to pack my camera EVERWHERE I go, was failure to have opportunity to capture a moment never returning.  I became, what many refer, a Japanese tourist. And he was right.  I found myself rushing to sunsets hoping to capture just the right colors, unexpected waterfalls on a trip to Colorado with friends, and candid moments of our times together.

I was asked to be the wedding photographer of a friend of mine (she was one of my pen pals). I blindly accepted the challenge completing it with success.  It was my first photographic 'job'.  Once done, I read that 'real' wedding photographers used large format cameras, and, since I was not made of money, rather than saving for a Hasselblad,  I saved enough money to buy a used Mamiya RB 67.  I wanted to attend Brooks Institute of Photography and got distracted along the way, my dad later admitting that he didn't know how they would have afforded it, but if I had chosen to, would have found a way.  My cameras became my best friends, and a tool for expression, and people enjoyed seeing my work.

The gossamer thread to this blog can be found in the souls who chose to sacrifice.  My parents and one of their friends, Rick, gave me a wonderful gift.  Others took risk, giving me privilege to capture their events, for pay.  They looked into a young heart and, seeing passion, fostered it freely.  I studied and read.  I also was given a natural gift for composition, developing enough artistic skill that I not require a hundred photos to get one good one, most of the time.

God has blessed me with an eye and heart willing to notice what most never take time to see let alone capture; and eye to turn the ordinary into the extraordinary, and I am grateful.  The photographic web in my life, can be found in the many who gave a chunk of their own to me; and for them, I rejoice, I revel, I appreciate.  How might you foster the gift in another today, tomorrow and in the weeks ahead?  What sacrifices are you willing to make to foster what may become a life long passion in another?  Who can you thank, today, as being one who fostered your passion and gift?  It's time to rejoice, revel and appreciate those who have done so for us.

Slaying the Giant

Rising.  Growing.  Standing tall.  I call this perspective 'hug-a-tree looking up', and I have a growing 'collection' of such photos.  Yesterday, in my blog, Encouraging Courage, I wrote about the courage required to join another in their battle.  Today, as continuation, I share one such story having privilege to know.  Tori was one student in my science classes a number of years ago.  She 'friended' me on Facebook and I have had opportunity to 'watch' her take on a giant.  Praying for a miracle, she received one.  But that would change.

Tori and her family moved away; away from San Diego to Kokomo, Indiana.  She, then had an infectious laugh and vibrant spirit, and I am confident, still does.  I had not heard from her for a while, but she discovered I had a Facebook, inviting me to be a friend (I am humbled that many of my students have asked and only 'friend' those who do).  It was then I learned of the reason she had been brought to my mind as part of my prayers.  Unknown to me, was her struggles she faced.  Severe headaches and a host of other symptoms led to the discovery of a mass in her brain.  The family, unknown to me, had put out a request for prayer and in angst the only hope was open brain surgery. Doctors removed the mass and the once spry and beautiful young lady seemed removed with it.  She was told that hope for a full recovery would not be possible; Tori and her family were left wondering what parts of her would remain. 

Slowly, painstakingly slow, Tori refused to relinquish herself to the diagnosis.  Seems, though she had lost much, they couldn't remove her spunk.  Little by little, she began to walk, feed herself and regain much of what she had lost, even her spunk returning with vigor.  It was then I learned of her fight (her 'friending me on Facebook).  It was then I realized why my God had brought her to mind occasionally.  It was then my vigilant prayers continued for her and a full, miraculous recovery, God providing it in spades.

Having personally scaled the mountain of miraculous recovery myself, I asked God continue to strengthen and provide Tori with all she needed, the courage to face each day, seeing, as I have, the joys of progress to complete healing.  Her posts moved from focus on the daily struggle to that of a 'normal' high school student.  In some ways, her life joined mine as the celebration of living fully returned.  In other ways, I was in awe of the courage God provided her in the face of a giant.  She became, one of my heroines; Tori standing as a champion of hope to a world oft loosing sight of hope.

The scenario changed suddenly this year, when despite all progress, all success, all joy, another mass was found.  My heart broke.  Only 18, why God would you submit her again to yet another challenge?

I watched (via Facebook and blog) as the family worked with doctors for the best approach.  I talked with Carrie (my pediatric nurse wife) about it and prayed for wisdom.  I sent notes of encouragement her way.  I prayed that God would lead her and the family to the right decision.  Proton beam therapy was the outcome, their choice, not wanting to chance embracing another giant hurdle of recovery.  Tori embarking on yet another challenging chapter in her life, rose to the challenge.  You can read about it in a blog (<--click on the word blog to go to it) created for her with some of her, her mother's and a friend's thoughts. Friends rallied about them.  Her boyfriend stood with the family and together all of us waited, watched and entreated the LORD as she endured yet another challenge.

Through it all, Tori did as I expected.  I'm sure, just like Job in the Bible, she had her seemingly insurmountable struggles.  I am confident that her spirit appeared broken at times, her wondering if it was all worth it.  But I also stand assured that the fighting spunk that is, and always will be, Tori showed up too. 

She still has long road ahead.  The hope?  That the proton beam therapy has shrunk and even killed the tumor, never to breathe life again.  My prayers?  Will continue, moving forward with requests that our God would do His mighty work in and through the lives of Tori and her family.  They inspire me.  Their fight, their trust in God, their faith building mine.  You see, they were the inspiration of yesterday's blog.  I was hoping for permission to provide a picture of one I see as a champion of faith, that humbles my battles.  For Tori has taken on and defeated one giant, and our prayers are for this other to be slayed as well.  Will you join us in the fight for a beautiful young lady?  Will you also hold up her family and friends as they stand, fast and pray for God's continued miracle in her life?  I believe in miracles.  Both Tori and I stand as examples of such.  Both she and I also realize that we don't stand alone, we stand with God.  He slays the giant as we walk in faith, participating in the slaying of the giant, with Him.

Encouraging Courage

Words are powerful.  Written or spoken, nothing has the power to change a heart and soul more swiftly than words.  They can erect a mountain of support to one in dire need.  They can pummel and pulverize a mountain of hope in that same soul.  So much can be said with so few, and so little can be said with volumes.  We use words daily, women requiring greater dosage than men.  Men use words mentally, rolling them around in our heads, revealing them with grunts and groans, and when prodded, spill the noodles spun in our noggin.  As I examine the blogging/Facebook universe, it is clear that so many seem to have so much to say, and also clear that so many have so little to say.

I have been blogging for a few years with few readers and fewer followers.  My dad is one of my faithfuls, our parents should be, right?  But if my words have no value, they are squandered, void and worthless.  T(here) is a challenge.  A call to use words carefully.  A request to make them count, really count as investments into hearts, and so it was, at it's inception, the desire of this man's blog.  Hoping for connection, via writing to speak into the crux of hearts in crucial moments, I write.  My desire?  To encourage, prod the cogitation of effective living, and press forward in the hard stuff, the exultant joy stuff, and the everywhere in between stuff of life and living.

I, becoming a writer, love language, enjoying well placed words.  Creating meaning and understanding, communicating clearly with brevity is difficult, but it is my desire as I work on this craft of wordsmithing.

Today, and probably for a few more blogs, I speak of courage.  My wife, working as a pediatric nurse, attended a class that disturbed me.  It was a class focusing on looking for signs of childhood suicide, a rapidly rising endemic.  Suicide is the act, the ultimate step of discouragement, and it is, final.  It is the loss of all courage, the belief that ending it all will 'fix' it, and it is heartbreaking.  Courage, according to dictionary.com, is the quality of mind or spirit enabling a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc. without fear; bravery, and it should be evident that a life pursuing or culminating in suicide has lost courage.

 I have come to believe that we can develop courage by being exposed to it, recognizing it for what it is, while being inspired, to our core, with the victory it brings for those who cling to it.  There is something deeply inspiring found in the intimate connection to a soul locked in courage against the greatest odds, even if they lose in the end.  There is also something powerful when we utilize courage to come alongside one who could use a boost of courage as together we join in their fight. I also believe that major media and our lives have become so cluttered with a fraudulent, sensationalized version that we see the real deal as only for the movies, only for a few, not really for us.

Truth is, real courage, real inspiration, real victories are all around us, and I want to encourage all of us to step into that world of struggle and victory, such that in our time to rise, we find ourselves up to the challenge.  Sure, it requires courage to walk into the hospital room of a very sick friend.  It really is hard to call, let alone visit, someone who is struggling because they lost their job, their spouse, their hope.  But it is imperative that we do for others what we hope they might do for us, come alongside in time of need to encourage courage.  Our words, or mostly our presence, speak volumes, impactful volumes into the lives of another.

My desire is that the words I use speak to the hearts and souls within us.  My hope is to encourage courage as I press through life with these footprints and faith.  My courage?  My faith?  Comes first from my LORD and God, and He is seen in the courage found as I encounter His children in the midst of their battles.  If we muster the courage to join others in the battle of life, we will see victory.

As I come alongside my friends facing their mountain of challenge, my desire is to encourage courage, and it is also my prayer that they do the same with me.  I know you will be surprised when you walk through the door of one in the midst of the battle.  Indeed, it takes courage to encourage.  If you find your heart racing and you are not sure what to say, just smile and stand in support.  Look beyond the situation to what could be if met with courage and diligence.  Speak to those hopes, the joy of overcoming against all odds.  More importantly, I have found, is to put our faith in the only one who knows all and cares for all, our LORD.  He will rock your world and theirs.  If you never do, you never stand with another, you never will find the joy that encouraging courage brings. 

Heroes are Only Human...Except One

A hero, according to Dictionary.com is "a man of distinguished courage or ability, admired for his brave deeds and noble qualities."  What is interesting to me also, is that the word hero is gender specific in English with the female word being heroine, "a woman of distinguished courage or ability, admired for her brave deeds and noble qualities."  When speaking of both, we use the masculine version of the word, like all other languages.  

I, like most, have my share of heroes and heroines.  These people, some well known, others to me, well known because of their distinguished ability, courage, personal integrity, brave deeds (shown toward me or others) and noble character traits, are people I admire.  I have discovered they deserve a great deal of my respect for the honorable things they do.  Each of us have our list of those who fit into each category of hero/heroine for many reasons.

There are some individuals that seem to capture the eyes of many, and those are mostly garnered by their level of fame attached to some public activity as they seemingly rise, head and shoulders above the rest.  Such was the fate of Lance Armstrong, and even Tiger Woods.  I need say nothing more to you, probably, except their names and you should certainly know of what I speak.  Let's face it, they join a host of heroes with chinks in their armor.  Every hero/heroine we choose to elevate to such status has shortcomings, and the cost of these chinks in their armor can devastate their standing.  Human weakness is found in all of us.  The consequence of human pride pressures and prods, us to become what we are not.  There is consequence to yielding or distracting the hero/heroine to be bigger and better than who they are.  Yielding to just one weakness can open the door to the destruction of character, devastating all they worked for and attained. 

Heroes are human, and that humanness is found in each of us, each of them.  It is miserable to watch a hero(ine) fall; Heartbreaking; Deflating.  It happens to many heroes.  Their drive to remain at the top, or their confidence at the top expose a weakness found in every human, the godlike character pressed into each, for we are created in God's image.  There are consequences for such failures.  The burden of the magnitude and significance of failures and fraud to be fully loaded on the shoulders of the bleeding hero(ine).  Do they deserve forgiveness?  Absolutely.  If we were in their shoes, would we fall to the same temptation and failure?  Probably.  Should the consequences of their failures be erased?  Absolutely not. 

When people ask me why I believe the Bible true, one of the reasons is exposed in this post.  If you take the time to read the Bible, you will discover the heroes of faith also had chinks in their armor, real weaknesses and real failures.  Clearly depicted in the Biblical accounts are the successes and failures of heroes of faith, and there were consequences for their failures.  Moses, Abraham, David, Paul, Peter and the cadre of heroes of faith made mistakes and they are written clearly for all of us to see.  What provides this soul great comfort is to also recognize that our God provides forgiveness for each, but holds into account the consequences for the waywardness of each, with the potential for restoration should their heart turn and return to God.  Don't believe me?  Read it for yourselves, in the Bible. 

What then, makes them remain heroes?  For every hero(ine) it is found in how they respond to the failure. A brokenhearted hero, rediscovering humility, caught in the aftermath of deception can remain a hero.  The consequence?  Everything they worked for along with that which gave them hero(ine) status, becomes tainted and compromised.  If they learn and accept the loss and tainted status, they are to be forgiven, should they ask for forgiveness.  The consequence(s) will fall where they must.  At some point, who they were and what they accomplished will stand, but that fateful turn of events, even a single failure, will color it all, forever.

I do have one hero who rises and stands above all.  He was fully human and fully God.  No one, though they tried, could point out a chink in His armor.  No one stands and fits the foretelling of His arrival several thousand years prior.  No one parsed scriptures as He.  No other could hold claim to living an absolutely perfect life, one that even His siblings could attest as perfect.  He, being fully God, did not consider it something to be grasped but submitted Himself, his will as part of the Trinity; God, Himself (Jesus) and the Holy Spirit.  He never failed.  He performed powerful healing.  He walked our world as a shining example of holiness and purity.  And, He was offered as sacrifice for all of us who fall short.

All of our heroes are, after all, fully human.  Created in the image of God as ascribed in scripture, we desire to be like Him, the ruler of our lives, looked up to by the entirety of humanity.  A few, like Mother Theresa, rise to the masses as one who deserves hero(ine) status.  The difference?  Some, like her, come to see a more complete image of God.  Not the arrogant or fame seeking God, for He is neither.  His character is forged in grace but offset with righteous judgement.  He offers forgiveness but holds us to account for the good of our, and other, souls.  He can provide the healing and restoration only if we learn from our failures, our sins, if you would.  Indeed, our heroes are fully human, except one.  Jesus was fully human, but also fully God.  Plenty of people have tried to deface, expose some sort of fraud, ruin His hero status, but nothing sticks to Him, making Jesus the only being whose life can stand and atone for our failures, our weaknesses, our shortcomings.  

I know I have one hero who will never let me down; never fail to be who He claimed, always point this heart to the heart of His Father unleashing His power through His true children (those who portray more of God's true nature and character) today and throughout history.  Jesus really lived.  He really lived and unencumbered, pure and perfect life.  He and all of scripture demonstrate clearly who is God and what a real and loving God does for His lost children. You see, Jesus was human, fully human and fully God.

All my heroes are human...except one, Jesus being fully human and fully God.  Many of my heroes are such because they espouse the character and nature of the God of the universe.  They turned away from their exposed failures returning to living lives that again speak of God's divine nature; His self sacrificing grace and love for we who wander; His desire that none should perish.  I have found only one to have pure, complete noble character, God, one whose courage and ability speak and reveal perfectly honorable character, Jesus, and one who reveals and answers my quest for truth and wisdom, the Holy Spirit.  You see, heroes are only human...except one...Jesus.  He alone was fully human, but live a fully God. What about your heroes? What value find you in they?  Are their values worth establishing them as real heroes? 

Counterfeit Counter Fight

It has taken this soul 55 years of living and decades of wrestling through life to discover an insight that is starting to transform my way of thinking and processing who I am, how I will live, where I am going and what I do.  The bottom line?  Examine everything in my life for counterfeits.

For most, it may seem clear that I have a life of faith.  Faith isn't a blind trust in God, at least mine is not, for I believe I am a man of reason attempting to find absolute truth.  I question everything including God and His existence. He has answered my queries with absolute sufficiency, but for now, this blog isn't about this.  However, I believe the God of the universe has opened my eyes to discover this 'truth'.

A counterfeit, according to Dictionary.com is something that is made in imitation so as to be passed off fraudulently or deceptively as genuine.  It's second definition is, pretend, unreal.  As I look around, I find myself being fooled less and less by the counterfeits of this world.  Less attracted to and participating in the enjoyment of being led into fraudulent living, and thankfully, now looking back, realize that I have been led towards truthful living as I have followed and pursued the true God.  For there is a counterfeit god.  He was given power and is even free to go about producing his counterfeit ways of rebellion and living that could lead many astray should they accept his counterfeits in life and living.

Think about it.  God says He is light.  He created a heavenly being, Lucifer who is the angel of light and who was given power and leadership but chose to rebel and lives as a counterfeit to his creator.  Why does an all powerful God allow such a heinous being infect our world and forge deceptive, fraudulent realities into it?  Because, if we diligently seek truth, decipher who really rules our world and whose power is above all others, we will not fall to such deception.

There are counterfeits to everything in life.  A counterfeit love seeks only personal pleasure and the happiness that is seen through the world's eyes.  Think about it.  If this kind of love is what we seek, when the pleasure runs out, or a new, more exciting one appears in our radar, we give up the old and move toward the apparent greater pleasure and happiness.  It becomes the quest of seeking the same pleasure we found in the first or early experience, akin to what I understand as the quest of drug user trying to rexperience their first 'high' with their body and mind never to have that again, because of its desensitization being exposed to the damage of the drug.  The quest for increasing pleasure, requiring increasing doses of the drug.  If the pursuit of this fraudulent experience becomes etched in the soul, it will become all this soul seeks, and as we know, end with disastrous consequence, ruining lives of those loved, robbing the user of their real life and pleasure, the true life with all it's highs and lows.

There can be other counterfeits to good aspects in life.  Seeking wealth, climbing the corporate ladder, becoming well known and well loved, believing our current troubles stem from our bad childhood, believing reality shows are real, even steeping our lives in cyberspace.  While there is nothing wrong with being wealthy, climbing the corporate ladder, becoming well know and well loved, or while the truth of a bad childhood, or the amusement found in reality shows can be entertaining, there can be a deception, a fraud that creeps into our lives if we lose sight of the rich and powerful values that should drive us and our thinking.

I know many wonderful people who have much more 'money' than Carrie and I, they not hoarding it, but using it to do God honoring and wonderful things in the life of others.  Some of these have climbed the corporate ladder, but not at the expense of others, rather cherishing cohorts, valuing and respecting bosses, some, even when they did not deserve valuing.  I have experience the joy and satisfaction they have in living humbly, not in excess.  They wrestle with value, what is important in life and living finding it not in the stuff or the quality of stuff they own, rather the relationships and lives that God brings them around.

They have much, give much and are satisfied living with much less than they could have if their hearts were only bound to this world.  The best of these have joined the fight, much like Carrie and I to seek truth, seek real value and the real joys of life.  No, none of us are what others might consider 'perfect', but we fight toward perfection.  

True love seeks deep and meaningful growth, cherishing trials and finding strength in getting through them together, as a married couple or as a group of people.   A true love is one forged of commitment, standing the test of time and trouble discovering that beauty isn't in the physical at all, but rather in the depth of connection, found in endurance and trust. 

For everything good, everything right, everything pure, everything holy there is a counterfeit,  Something that looks, feels and even seems like the real thing.  Something that is so close to right we believe it to be the true and real object.  There is a counterfeit god. There is a danger in filling our lives with counterfeit love, pleasure  and living.   If we do not fight to see or recognize the fraud before us, our minds can become so numb to them that we end up living and believing we enjoy a counterfeit filled life.  If it were blatant, we surely would not pursue it.  No, it is so close to the true and reality of life and living that we cannot see it unless we carefully seek the truth.  The only way to not be taken by counterfeits is to counter fight against being taken by such fraud.  I have even done such with God Himself, having found Him full of honor and truth; whose character and nature expose everything counterfeit, transforming my heart and thoughts toward reality and a way of living that I hope, display His character for all to see.

Truly Breathtaking

A friend of mine, when asked why he doesn't like to read, told me that if it didn't have pictures, he wouldn't read it.  I have been posting daily, one photo from our (Carrie and my) trip to O'ahu and Mau'i on my Facebook.  Each day has an image and a thought related to it; and it struck me.  Why am I not adding some of my photographic talents to my blog?  I have done so on occasion.  Why not try and make it a regular feature?  So it begins...for now, with this image.

This path is one we descended into the crater of Haleakala, the main volcano forming the island of Mau'i, Hawaii.  For most tourists, it is a road less traveled, because the bus tours do not allow the time for such excursions, herding people to the viewpoint (out of the picture to the right) and then off again.  As Carrie and I looked into the crater from the viewpoint, we saw this empty trail and for me, it was all I needed to entice me, being the road less traveled.

Most, are satisfied with the common view.  Most see the road less traveled with haunting discomfort, seeing its apparent absence of others as a warning sign of potential danger rather than the probability of experiencing a rare and beautiful excursion, an alternate view of something already breath taking. Clearly it is a road and has seen a number of travelers.  Sure, the view from the top is indeed breath taking.  But the view from inside, having taken the risk that most have not, unfolds the possibility to see uniquely and with the right gifts, capture the moment as most would never have opportunity.

So you see another on this road?

I would wager that you may not have taken the time to carefully examine my image.  Is the road really devoid of another?  Can you find evidence, even in this lower resolution image of someone else on the road?  Actually, there was an European couple, their infant son and young daughter on the road in this picture.  Most will not see them unless, as I have now pointed out their presence.

Many see the vast expanse, lacking vegetation and shade as foreboding.   Coupled with the island warmth and blazing sun, they sense danger, and surely there is danger for one unprepared, and out of shape.  But, because I have been exercising, and because we had both water and snacks for a calculated venture, our trip in and out was not easy, but magical.  Sure, it was easier getting in, but the work getting out required pacing and perseverance. 

As we passed the family coming up in my photo, it was confirmed to us, that the trip was doable for Carrie and I, and I was hoping they would serve as human subjects for my image when we arrived somewhere down the road, for there were no other subjects to be found as we descended.  And, they cooperated.  Waiting for the right moment, composing the winding trail in my viewfinder, along with a solo shrub, I depressed the shutter.

I am thankful that my partner in life, Carrie, has come to accept, love and become willing to freely join me on my adventures.  It is in her nature, for she ventured away from her miniscule home town to Los Angles to attend Biola college, after already having one degree, pursing her nursing degree.  She did so alone, funding it herself.

In those days, I had a budding passion for writing and tried doing so with guys but most guys wouldn't write back to me with regularity.  I discovered that female pen pals were great...and safe.  It was then, 33 years ago, I introduced myself to her with a letter, prodding her address from another young lady who was a pen pal of mine.  My eventual love for Carrie blossomed with it's result blooming two great kids and from one of them, our first grandson, and a deepening love for our LORD, together.

We have a plethora of joys and moments to share from our life together, desiring to share it with our friends.  We also had a plethora of struggles and times of exceeding loneliness (even while married) to bear in my life.  Carrie and I have discovered that without the struggles we would not appreciate the joys. Together, we have discovered that if the road less traveled were not embarked or embraced, we would not have seen the beauty nor felt the sense of accomplishment others miss or choose to abandon.  Mostly though, we am filled with thanksgiving, thankful for the eyes to see in the midst of the venture, great and mighty works of the LORD.

He has given me the only partner whose risk has carried her on this adventure with me. Together we have shared, in abundance, precious and unique views of life many do not.  There is a cost to commitment but it is miniscule compared to the riches of working together.  Carrie has descended into the depths of my life, as I her.  For some, this road is a road less traveled.  Our deepest joys can be found on the other side of fear.  A most amazing view awaits those who endure, persevere and work together in life.  Those who risk little, gain little.  My hope is that you find inspiration and are spurred by this solitary blog, to take the road less traveled, take and hold on to risk and those who join you on the venture.  What you will find there, I promise, is truly breathtaking.

Do It Yourself...Brainsurgery???

I hope you got a laugh from the title of this blog.  I also hoped it piqued your curiosity to investigate and read.  Simply queried, when is do it yourself brain surgery a good idea?  When is do it yourself anything a good idea or a bad one?

Working at Lowe's has been an interesting experience and I can't believe I've been there over a year now.  After a year, I am convinced that retail is not to be my career and have experienced a great deal of growth in working on my 'humility' merit badge...but that is for another blog.  A few weeks ago, I had the joy of attending a men's retreat whose keynote speaker was a brain surgeon who offers to pray with his patients.  No, not because he isn't any good at it (I know you thought that, some of his patients do too).  In fact, he's a well known leading brain surgeon in 'the industry'.

I have met Dr. David Levy before.  I have read his book (he is working on another).  I even have his personal phone number and email, and no, he isn't a friend of mine, he's just a man on a mission and rightly trusts that I won't abuse 'my privilege'.  He came to speak at our church because I had taken the risk to see if he would, and he did.  That's how it all started.  I suppose I share this with you to give you a sense of his character.  He is a extremely successful, as an incredibly gifted neurosurgeon, could be arrogant and self glorifying, but in amazing ways is wonderfully humble and quite transparent about his 'mistakes' (not only in surgery but in life as well), and very thankful for the plethora of successes.  In short, he is real.  A real man, a real and amazingly gifted surgeon, a real follower of the LORD.

So, who would I want doing do it yourself brain surgery on me?  You got it, Dr. David Levy.  Why?  Because he is trained?  Yes.  But mostly?  Because he understands his position as a brain surgeon and has learned not to just do it himself.  David's hands are blessed by God for His use, His glory and His kingdom.  He knows he has been given the gift but also knows that this gift can be used to help or hurt a patient and that his patient's life is not in his hands, but the hands of God.  He shares account after account of great outcomes, but also the struggles along the way, his turning or even stopping in the midst of surgery to ask for God's guidance and is not shy to share his failures, and in brain surgery, a 'failure' costs a life.

I am a do it yourselfer.  I am not afraid to try and fix many things, but fix a brain by doing surgery?  Not unless I were to undergo the long training of Dr. Levy.  Not unless I had the root personal skills and drive he has.  And not without the calling and skill he has to do amazing things in the brain.  I can, however, do, risk and rise to the challenges fit for me.  However, I am also learning that I am not to do it myself.

When is it good to do it yourself?  And not?  Obviously a very small percentage of our world would take on brain surgery and do it ourselves.  But some are called to do it, some good, some great and some, well, need find another profession.  But can and should we, normal people become do it yourselfers?  I believe it is the wellspring of life to press forward, continue learning, accomplishing greater and greater successes (and failures) in this thing called life.

People who are coddled and never challenged to continually learn new things, never have many opportunities to try and fail, become people who risk little. They most likely will not become do it yourserlfers.  We have developed, as a society many such people; people who have been enabled and expect instant success at everything they do, or to be paid well even though they aren't very good...at anything.  Most of these have not 'paid their dues'.  You learn humility by starting a career sweeping floors (or, as in my late years of employ, sorting and straightening out pluming fixtures on the shelf).  If that is all you can do, do it with all your heart.  Even if seems below you, be the best floor sweeper (or plumbing fixture sorter) you can be.  I have discovered new joy in doing tasks that 'are far below my credentials' enabling me to do it with all my heart.  Like laundry, I can sort out the PVC (polyvinyl chloride) fixtures every day without end, but can stand proud when, for the moment, every single piece is where it belongs (or in laundry, when every piece of clothing is clean except the stuff you are wearing).

There is a new paradigm arising in business.  It is called servant leadership, and at it's heart is, I believe, the heart of Jesus Christ.  He was and will always be, the best example of a servant leader.  He called fishermen to become skilled teachers and learners of something difficult; being a disciple, a likeness of the Messiah, kids of His kingdom.  It was psychological brain surgery.  Every account of what He did with them was a way of retraining them 'how to think', 'how to do'.  When His disciples thought they were about to die while in the storm on the Galilee Sea, and, as Jesus was sleeping on the small boat, He was trying to teach them (and us) to be calm in the storm (David spoke of this at our church, click to hear).  It wasn't their lives that were at risk, but their faith and trust in the one who had given them their lives.  When Jesus fed the crowd (5,000 of them) with a kid's lunch, He was trying to retrain His disciples brains (and ours) to see who was their miraculous provider for food and care.  He also demonstrated this care when, after an all night fishing trip, tired and completely unsuccessful, He told them (and us) to throw their (our) nets over the other side of the boat instead of just finally rowing to shore.  He provided the most bountiful catch EVER!  I now see every account in scripture (Old and New Testament) as psychological brain surgery.  Removing my 'wrong' and often selfish training, replacing it with His, selfless and as a more provocative means to live this life with confidence and peace.  And He does this not by force or demand, but as a servant, wanting to help them discover the deep truths of following a servant.

Dr. Levy has it right.  He never wants to now 'do it himself', or do anything himself.  He has discovered the keys to giving life are not in his hands, but in the hands of our God.  He trusts God to do His (God's) work with the work of his (Dr. Levy's) hands, heart, and mind.  If we think about EVERYTHING, we should take the same stance, for if we go about doing it ourselves, we will not only fail miserably in this life, but fail to find peace in the life to come.  It is not failure I fear, nor does Dr. Levy, for we learn through the God led failures.  But, when we do it ourselves and fail, it truly is 'our own fault'.

It is time for us to become servant leaders rather than do it yourselfers.  Most will not rise to this call.  If you are tempted to say that I am wrong, or "I'll try this another time", there may never come 'another time'.  I am not saying I have this down.  I too am like the disciples spoken of in scripture.  They didn't get it too.  But like them, even when the storms are raging and I think I'm gonna die?  I want to run to Jesus, wake Him up and ask Him if He'll calm the storm rather than try to do it myself.  My desire is to follow in the storm and get to the other side, which He promises can be found here and in my life to come.

Dr. David Levy has it right.  Do it yourself brain surgery?  Never.  Do it with God brain surgery?  Always.