Powerful Not Puny

For four and a half years now, I have been the primary care giver for my mom, who has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's. My dad, fought the war of pancreatic cancer for over a year, his last years calling me to be wingman in the caring for he and mom, and that too was very challenging.

My parents lived a little over an hour north of our San Diego County base.  My brother, living six hours away joined in as he could, I treasure every moment he joined me as wingman for there is nothing better than siblings flying side by side in battle.  As dad's health deteriorated, I was enlisted to care for their yard, take them to all his doctor appointments and the eventual surgery to save what they could of his pancreas, which fell apart as they tried to do so.  Dad nearly died on the operating table.  We cried out to God, I enlisted my prayer friends in immediacy and they asked for a miracle.  Another surgeon joined in and while they could not save my dad’s pancreas, they did save his life.  God answered.  Dad became an instant diabetic.

I have the privilege of serving part time as an Assistant Pastor, my wife being the major breadwinner as a Pediatric Registered Nurse.  I would have perished in 2003 if it weren’t for her skills, but that is for another story.  Because of my blessed flexibility I was able, whenever the need arose, to jump into my truck, make the commute to be at the side of my mom and dad spending precious time serving them.  And now I continue, with life and love, to serve my mom.

You can learn a lot about your parents when one of them slips away.  I already knew that dad was primary in the relationship of financial provision with great wisdom to prepare for their retirement years.  I didn’t realize that he was the primary instigator of most things social.  Looking back, I see it, dad caring and drawing essential aspects of conversation easily making anyone feel welcome.  Nonjudgmental.  Endearing.  Warm.  Fun.  That was my dad.  And his lady, my mom, faithfully followed his requests cooking delicious food, sending birthday and Christmas cards, keeping their home ready for any drop by visitor.  I always said you could perform surgery in mom and dad’s home, it was always that clean.

Ever since dad’s passing, mom has seemed lost.  Part of it due to dementia now fully diagnosed as Alzheimer’s, some of that foisted forward because of his absence in her life.  I believe dad already saw the writing on the wall and wanted to remain so he could continue lovingly caring for her, though it would have been quite the challenge for him, but his cancer ripped him away from us.

So here I stand, having walked four and a half years without dad.  It is my hope and prayer that my blog and Facebook page will serve to help others understand that walking with faith, a relationship with God and Jesus, opens the door for a life far more powerful and beautiful than one lived in simple human power.  I read my Bible, because it clearly demonstrates the power and nature of my Creator.  I engage Him in my daily routines because He has for me a life that will be glorious beyond my capabilities when His are evident and primary. 

I get to be here for my mom.  Trust me, it isn’t easy, managing her finances, healthcare and living situation, but I cherish every moment I get with her thankful to provide what she needs in her last years.  I take her to all her appointments, hair, nails, doctor and medical appointments and have lunch with her every week before bowling in our senior’s league.  In the big scheme of things, these may seem insignificant, but to my mom, her peace of mind having lost the love of her life is huge and to this son, I find significant peace in knowing she is being cared for with dignity and love. 

I doubt I will be famous, nor do I wish to be.  I’ve been the recipient of stares and curiosity from the public and even had people photograph me and run away because they wanted a picture of a curiosity.  But that too is for another story.  My only prayer is that some will read and be inspired to enlist the power of almighty God to be and do the right things at the right time with the right people seeing glorious life and living as result with footprints and faith.  God sized investments into the lives of those around us.

Have you grown weary of a puny, thin life?  Would you like to see something glorious and beautiful as your legacy?  May I suggest you stop walking solely on your own, with your own agenda and start walking with the God of the universe joining His?  You will discover dimensions of life you never dreamed possible even when the stuff of life seems to try to rip you apart.  God will bring it all together for His glory.