His Work for His Glory His Way

There seems to be a thread, a common theme in almost every story in the Bible; God choosing to work in unusual and unexpected ways, very different from what we would think 'should' be.  He chose Moses over his brother Aaron to lead His people, Aaron far more skilled and honed as a leader.  And an even more powerful statement was found in Aaron's recognition and yielding of pride, skill and authority to his brother.  In another account, Jesus Himself celebrated the giving of a widow's mite, giving God all she had over the confluence of other's seemingly large contributions.  And again, when no skilled Israelite would stand against the ogre, Goliath, God sent a shepherd to slay him.  At most every turn God seems to honor humility and a willing spirit over that which the world would look to.

Every year, as I sit before my God, I ask Him to help me see that which He would like to foster more of in me.  Last year, it was how to deal with disappointment, discovering that I get disappointed when I have expectations that are not His.  God heaped the lesson on me as I expected my dad to do better than he did in his fight with pancreatic cancer; dad, instead, succumbing to the disease mid year.  The unexpected happened though.  I was not disappointed.  God showed me how to honor my father as I walked and talked with both He and my parents.  God was forging in me the truth that if I expect to see Him work as He wills for His glory I will not face disappointment, and I have yet to be disappointed when I look to His plan for us.

In my opening volley I spoke of the interesting way God chooses, the unexpected way, to do His work.  Last year, God developed in my heart a new way to look ahead with expectation, expecting to see Him work His will for His people, including me, and He provided the eyes and heart to understand through the midst of trial and angst.  At each turn with my dad along with the choices we made, I developed the expectation that God would do His work, me to walk in the next steps as obediently as I felt led.  When the man who was a fighter and full of joy started giving up and loosing his joy, it was then I knew dad's end was approaching.  Rather than fight it, it became my job to usher dad toward heaven, and I hope God succeeded in leading him there.

Last year, as God worked on my ideas of expectation, He also started a work toward humility.  I have often been called a Renaissance man, blessed with many talents, and I started to discover that when you are such, you easily can fall into an air of pride and arrogance.  What started last year must continue into this one.  Indeed God will continue leading me and helping me with expectations and disappointments, I'm sure.  And I hopefully will continue growing in my understanding and belief that I will never get disappointed when I see and expect Him to work, His way.  Yet, in the year ahead, as I ask for His leading, He seems to be showing me my need to develop humility.  Not the false form, the 'looking' humble, but the real deal.

It seems to me that God chooses to use those who are first humble.  Like the widow choosing to give all of her money as her offering, she trusted God to provide and I'm sure He did.  Like David, we all have skills and how cool would it be if our skills were used in interesting ways to accomplish big things for God's glory?  I find myself trying to squash my need to get and take credit for things I do or am capable of doing.  And to be honest at times it is killing me.  When someone else is given credit for something I am doing or have done, it is hard to shut up and not correct them, but I am growing in success at it and it is what God seems to desire to develop in me....a real broken and contrite spirit, available for His use, letting credit fall on any He desires.  I am learning the joy of being the one in the background, satisfied that He knows all I have done.

I know I will continue in failure as I press forward trying to understand humility and grow into it. I struggled with expectations and disappointments last year, but seemed to progress quickly as I continued reading scripture, walking and talking with God along the way.  I have come to expect God to do amazing work and have yet to be disappointed as He does His work for His glory His way.  I believe He desires to develop deep, honorable humility within my soul, and pray for it's unfolding as He leads me through this next year.  My pride will continue kicking and screaming, yet my prayer is a request for it's slaying.  A quieting satisfaction is what I believe awaits at the end of this quest.  He leads me by still waters.  He restores my soul as God develops His work for His glory His way.