Two years ago, our family gathered in our home; family for the first time from around the world, literally. Our nephew and his new wife joined us from Israel, my brother and his family joined us from Fresno, CA (much closer but still on the world), and niece, from the Los Angeles area (even closer), my parents from Menifee, CA, and our family all here in San Diego.
In a last minute effort, before some departed, I asked if we could take a picture together and we all piled into vehicles heading to a nearby park, this being one of the many pictures captured (others were of the couples etc.). The ensuing year would reveal my dad's discovery of pancreatic cancer. The family was unable to gather again last Thanksgiving, but we were grateful it seemed after pancreatectomy that he had beaten it. Indeed we were very thankful to enjoy it with some of the family around our table again.
This year, dad will not be with us. It is our first and we remain thankful. We have a crucial choice in life that will affect everything we do. If we do not choose thanksgiving, our lives will be filled with bitterness, anger, self-indulgence, devoid of peace and any form of joy. We could see dad's absence, focusing on that, or see his life and the plethora of joys, ethics, integrity and love poured into us, chunks of his life part of ours. Our gathering ensures and speaks of all dad was and remains. Once again, our family will be spread 'around the world' celebrating with thanksgiving, not gathered at our table with the same thoughts in our souls as we remember the man who was my father.
I am confident no bitterness or anger will draw near our thanksgiving tables. While dad's absence clearly will be felt, none of us would trade anything in place of his life into ours. Thanksgiving that rises from hearts not tried, nor devoid of struggle are shallow offerings of thanks. Take a moment and think, really wrestle with this truth. The most powerful, meaningful celebrations of life rise from a heart that is tried. For in my life, the greatest, most sincere, abundantly rich thoughts of thanksgiving rises in response from the most challenging of life's events.
Posting a thought on a relative's blog, their son having been hospitalized over Thanksgiving last year I wrote, "Enduring hard times with wonderful outcome sure does add a great deal of thanksgiving to our plates."
And I believe this true. But enduring hard times without wonderful outcome can offer even greater thanksgiving to our plates if we do not get consumed by the singular event, in this case the passing of my dad, his absence from our time together. I have and will cherish every single moment our family and friends have together. It is exactly what dad did and showed us.
Last night we celebrated my wife's passing of her board certification test, our oldest son and daughter-in-law with their son, and our youngest son with his girlfriend joining us. As I sat around the table, my heart reveled in thanksgiving for their presence in support of Carrie. It was another of the many thanks that rises in my heart.
Abundant thanksgiving richly rises from a heart that is tried. I believe it is God's way of revealing to us, in some small way, the cost of our eternal rescue. There is no other 'religion' where god subjects himself to abuse and scorn of his creatures in order to redeem them. In my wildest of dreams I can't understand why God would leave heaven and walk as a man. Jesus' heart was tried just like ours only found perfect. He faced more trial than any human ever in the history of earth and overcame so we might find life in Him. Now this is God, and I desire to follow Him. Wildest of dreams will pale to the eternal bliss I will someday share with my dad
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